Boldness and distraction

a spiral of French knots

There's been no time for painting so far this year.  During my free moments lately, I find comfort in stitching.  And I find that my stitches, which were very tentative at first, are becoming bolder.

Things are still not back to normal here.  I'm still very distracted.  All in knots.  There's little time for blogging while I spend as much time as possible with our old Beau.  Looking deeply into his eyes, waiting for him to tell me when he is ready to go.  He may still rebound.  I hope so. . .

The flower on my muslin has chosen to be a lotus, a very symbolic flower, which stands for rebirth and enlightenment in some cultures.  Very appropriate for me right now, I think.

The spiral of tiny star-shaped stitches has overshadowed the ink, which whispered "begin begin begin" when I first started working on this piece.  If you look closely, though, you can still see glimpses of those first whispers on the cloth.

But in the center, the embroidered word has become bolder.  I'm not sure if the spiral begins with the word and works its way outward, or spirals inward toward the word.  Both, maybe.

I've never really had one word that spurred me on for an entire year.  This year might be different.  I think "Begin" is a perfect word for this year.  This year I'll focus on beginning all the things I've put off for years.

In fact, it might be my word for life.  Begin.

Up and down, round and round. . .

(detail of muslin with acrylic paint, ink, wool, embroidery floss)

Up and down, round and round - that's a pretty good description of my life (and moods) lately.  Other than some creative cooking, I haven't had much opportunity to create lately.  Just a few stitches to start embellishing the piece of muslin that I've become obsessed with.  

(detail of muslin with acrylic paint, ink, Inktense pencils, embroidery floss)

Our old dog, Beau, now only eats if we entice him by hand-feeding him first.  Even this takes time and patience on our part, since he is slowly reverting back to the timid dog he was when we adopted him from the shelter.   He is slowly forgetting what he learned during his time with us.  He is forgetting that he learned to feel safe and confident and happy with us, and that the dog food in his bowl is his to enjoy.  It's sad to see him old and confused and in pain.  It's sad to know that our days with him are numbered.

Unfortunately, there's been very little time in my life lately to read and comment on blogs and elsewhere online, either.  But after next week, I think I'll have a bit more time again.

Thanks to all who commented on my last posts.  I may not get around to thanking you each personally, but I value all your comments more than you'll ever know.

In the mean time, I'm really loving this change from painting and drawing on paper and canvas, to stitching on muslin.  More changes are coming, too, I think, but I'll still find my way back to painting those portraits that I love.

I have a feeling this will be an interesting year, and I'm working my way into it slowly. 

"Take a breath,

take your time, 

spread your wings

and rise."

~ Counting Crows lyric

Begin

It's the first day of a new year- what a perfect day for new beginnings!

Not much has gone according to plan since I posted here last.  As a result, I've been keeping a low profile online.  And I'll continue to do so for a while.

Maybe I'll use this forced interruption as an opportunity to begin doing many things differently this year.  Beginning to do something differently can start as a whisper, after all.

(detail of ink and thread on painted muslin)

The important thing is to begin.

(detail of ink and Intense pencils on painted muslin)

And to simply be, sometimes. 

I've been slowly beginning to work on my muslin rags.  Letting them tell me what they want to be.

"Be willing to be a beginner

every single morning."

~ Meister Eckhart

Happy New Year, everyone!

xo