Blogging is an interesting phenomenon. It attracts both people who keep written paper journals and diaries, as well as people who don't. I'm one of those that eagerly starts a new journal with the best of intentions, only to stop a few days later. I put the book in a safe place, thinking I'll get back to it again, but I never do. I've done this about 10 times, and have 10 beautiful little books containing a few pages of frantic scribbles, the rest of the pages remain blank.
The photo at the top of this post was my original blog header. It's interesting to re-read early posts in a blog, and I find my own very interesting. It's been about eight months since I started this blog, and in a way it's been like waiting the nine months for a baby to be born. In the beginning, this blog was all about me. Who was I? Where was I going? Who did I want to be? I've never indulged in looking at myself this way before.
It was a very personal blog, very few people found me and read my words, and it was OK. I was writing mostly for myself, anyway, and I was too shy to leave comments on other blogs and bring attention to myself.
As I became more comfortable with myself, and the idea of baring my soul in a blog, or anywhere, I began to look outside of myself more and more. I began to see the possibilities available to me in my own future, and the possible directions my blog could take. This blog was like a baby in a very basic sense. I had an idea of what it would be, but it seemed to have a mind of its own and was taking a direction I never anticipated.
And with my blog, my life was changing and growing and reaching a new phase, as well. In the eight months that I've had this blog, both the blog and I have evolved from something that was primarily introspective and self-centered, to something that looks outward and eagerly anticipates what is ahead in the world outside.
The next phase of my life and the life of my blog are almost ready to be born.
In past posts, I've often been so eager to post an idea, that I often quickly slapped together an illustration for my words. Well, I'm not going to do that anymore. I'm really capable of better "art" than I've been showing here. There will be no more excuses that I don't have the studio or the time to create what I want to create. I will have a renewed emphasis for quality over quantity, in all aspects of my life.
I've mentioned in past posts how Mr. C and I decided to embrace a more simple life when I decided to give up my career to be a full-time mom. It meant twice as many people were going to live on half the income we had made together. I can't complain. It hasn't been easy, and I've had to be creative and thrifty in many ways. But, it's worked out well for us. We have always had all we needed, and many luxuries besides. Currently, all four of us share this very slow, tired, old 1998 computer, but I am truly grateful we have a computer with internet access, and a comfortable chair to sit in while we use the computer.
I'm also grateful for the opportunity to work with autistic children. It may be a while before I'm assigned to work with a child. These agencies like to use college students and grad students for these line therapist positions, so I'm up against ageism. But I'm up against that almost everywhere I go to look for employment at this point, and this type of postion is worth fighting for. In the mean time I'm reading a number of recommended books about autism, learning Spanish, and becoming a better photographer and, hopefully, a true artist.
Anything that spurs you on to grow and keep learning is a good thing, as far as I'm concerned. I hope to keep growing and learning and finding new ways to be a productive member of the human race, and the blogging world. One day at a time.
I'm so happy to be here. I'm happy you're here, too!
